“Why are you posting this on the 14th October, Jade?” you ask. “Surely a post about last minute Halloween costumes should be posted…you know, at the last minute.”

Well, my lazy garbage people, I know that you’re so last minute if you don’t see this post now you won’t actually bother at all. At least by showing you some quick ideas here, on this date, the seed is planted.

DON’T BE A PARTY POOPER. DRESS UP. EMBRACE HALLOWEEN. DON’T BE A CAT AGAIN.

Here are a few suggestions:

The wall from Stranger Things 

Lots of people at conventions this year have embraced all things Stranger Things but instead of dressing up like Eleven or crazy Joyce they’re fashioning very simple costumes to look like the alphabet wall. So chic. So iconic. It’s such a simple but amazing costume idea and you can definitely give it a go to at the last minute.

You will need:

• Floral shirt or dress you don’t mind ruining
• Thick black permanent marker
• Christmas lights

Method:

1. Simply scrawl the alphabet in rows on the shirt/dress of your choice.
2. Then either drape Christmas lights around you and secure them with safety pins, or sew them onto the material one by one.
3. Bonus points are awarded if you have battery pack lights that actually light up.

Cereal killer 

Ah, the classic cereal killer costume. It’s been tried and tested over the years and never fails to elicit a few giggles at the Halloween party, as everyone applauds you for your horror themed  pun but also your complete lack of ability of putting together a costume in time. Oh, you.

You will need:

• Mini cereal boxes – remove the cereal packets first and eat them for energy as you put this costume together.
• Plastic knives.
• Fake blood – oh, look, here’s  a recipe.
• Safety pins or strong double sided tape.

Method:

1. Take an old t-shirt or jumper (preferably nothing in a flimsy material) and attach the cereal boxes to this in random places.
2. Take your plastic knives and stab them into the cereal boxes – please do this when you’re NOT wearing the t-shirt. Ensure they stay in the box but if you’ve been a bit too vicious just use some tape to keep them in place.
3. Splash your fake blood onto the boxes and your t-shirt.
4. Boom. Done.

Here’s Johnny

Everyone knows that iconic scene from the Shining, where Jack Nicholson really wants to have a chat with his wife in the bathroom because she’s taking such a long time in there shaving her legs, so he grabs an axe and lovingly hacks into the doorframe. He even announces it’s him by shouting ‘Here’s Jonny!’ but all she can do is scream, even when he pushes his face through the door to say hello. Also that knife she’s holding doesn’t look safe. A razor would do a better job.

Recreate that scene with something like this:

You will need:

• A piece of cardboard – rectangular and bigger than your head.
• Brown paint or marker.
• Elastic
• Paper fastener pins
• A nice green plaid shirt (flannel is best)

Method:

1. Grab your paint or marker and draw on wood shaped patterns, take a look at the nearest door or floorboard for inspiration. You know what wood looks like *sniggers*. Leave it to dry.
2. Cut a hole in the middle of your cardboard but don’t make it neat, try to leave some ‘splinters’ around the edges to look like you’ve burst through it. Ensure the hole is big enough for your face.
3. Attach your elastic – you can pick this up from your nearest Hobbycraft or even the sewing shelf at the supermarket – using the paper fastener pins. Simply push it through the cardboard then through the elastic and pull the tabs at the back to secure it in place.
4. Slip this onto your face and look menacing. Wear your nice, green plaid shirt and some jeans.
5. Shout ‘Here’s (your name)’ in people’s faces all day/night.

And there you go, three very easy, very simple Halloween costumes that take very little time to construct and that you can probably make using items from around your home. You have no excuse.

Jade